Rosalind Carman, Psychotherapist
Karen McHugh, Property Lawyer
As a psychotherapist, issues relating to divorce or separation commonly arise in my clinical practice. Helping clients steer their way through stress and the necessary practical steps to take in the event of relationship breakdown, forms much of what I do. An impending divorce or dissolution of a civil partnership may come as a shock, and navigating the immediate crises and possible legal implications, is something to think about.
I asked Property Lawyer, Karen McHugh, about one of the most common questions that arises: how to deal with property.
Karen says:
"Apart from issues to do with custody of children, dealing with assets, including property, is likely to be among the most contentious issues the parties need to face. There may be different treatment of joint assets depending on whether you are married, or in a formal civil partnership, or are cohabitating. Additional complications can arise where property is mortgaged and where you cannot reach agreement over the contributions each of you have made towards the purchase of the property. Equally complicated, is dealing with situations where one party has made contributions such as paying bills or taking on caring responsibilities, as opposed to directly paying towards the purchase price or the mortgage. In addition, there may be more than one property to deal with and/or assets may be held overseas, as well as in the UK. Property may be jointly rented or owned by either one or both parties. Cohabiting couples may need to take additional steps to demonstrate what has been agreed between them in relation to their assets. Interestingly, with the rise in the number of questions around pre-nuptial agreements (pre-nups) these are still not always formally recognised in the U.K. but courts are increasingly looking at their terms to help assist in decision making.
It is therefore important to get proper legal advice to inform yourself of all your options. Get as much advice as you can before starting to make any decisions.
It may ultimately be the court’s role to decide on the division of assets between you both. However, if you and your partner agree, you may be able to settle between yourselves the terms of your separation including the division of assets such as the family home. Some couples achieve full mutual co-operation. In other cases, the assistance of a mediator can help overcome some contentious issues. A mediator is an independent third person who can help you both work through issues where you are struggling to reach agreement”.
Ros says:
Couples Counselling can often be helpful as a first step, because not all relationship breakdowns need end in divorce. Couples often feel that regardless of the ‘end game’ they have at least tried to work together to resolve their differences. This shows a commitment to working through often contentious issues in a collaborative environment and can sometimes promote a deeper understanding, even if divorce or separation cannot be avoided.
I asked Karen what happens in the event that neither counselling or mediation work:
Karen says:
“Where a breakup is not mutually consensual or is very disputed, you may need more detailed legal advice and may ultimately need the court to make an order. Do note, a court may well want to see that the parties have tried to mediate at some stage in the process. Mediation can also help to narrow down issues, even if a court hearing is ultimately required.
If the matter needs to be decided by the court, and if you have young children, the court may order that you and your children can remain in the family home until the youngest reaches 18. If you have property and you both agree to sell, you may get an order to sell and split the proceeds of sale. In other cases, it may be possible to buy out your partner’s share. In the case of mortgaged property, you will need to speak to and reach agreement with your mortgage company as to what should happen.
You may need legal advice at each stage of the process. Whatever the outcome, it is advisable to get the final decision drawn up in a court order"
Please feel free to contact Rosalind or Karen with any questions.
Rosalind Carman is a Psychotherapist at 37 Queen Anne Street W1G9JB
Email: therapy@roscarman.co.uk
Karen McHugh is an Interim Legal Counsel - Self Employed
Contact: Linkedin
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